7 Books for Self-Love and Confidence
Self-Love Essentials: 7 Books to Strengthen Your Self-Worth this Valentine’s Day
Hello, my loves!
February has arrived, and while the shops are busy flogging heart-shaped chocolates and roses that barely last 48 hours, I’m taking a different approach. This month is all about love – not just the romantic kind, but the love you give to your friends, your family, and most importantly, yourself.
Now, let’s be real, Valentine’s Day gets a bad rap. Without fail, you’ll hear at least one grumpy sod moaning about how it’s all a capitalist scam designed to fill the pockets of card companies and florists. WELP. I happen to love it. Any excuse for extra choccies? Erm, yes, thank you.
I am quite the romantic, if I do say so. And while, yes, you should appreciate your partner, your best mate, or your cat (or pug) all year round, who in their right mind would turn their nose up at a full day dedicated to making someone feel special? Gah!
But here’s the thing: what about YOU?
If you’re single, feeling a bit lost in the friendship department, or not particularly close to your family why the heck aren’t you romancing yourself?! You are, after all, in a lifelong relationship with that gorgeous person in the mirror.
So, to celebrate the most important relationship of all (the one with yourself), I’ve put together a self-love reading list filled with books I cannot wait to dive into. Think confidence-building, boundary-setting, and all the warm-and-fuzzy personal growth vibes, perfect for a solo lovefest with a coffee and a couple of bourbon creams.
Here’s what’s on my self-worth radar…
Self Help: This Is Your Chance to Change Your Life by Gabrielle Bernstein
Predicted Rating: 4/5
Tackles: Inner peace, letting go of fear, emotional healing
Release Date: December 31st, 2024
Gabrielle Bernstein is back, and this time she’s bringing Internal Family Systems (IFS) Therapy out of the therapist’s chair and into our everyday lives. This book promises to be a game-changer, offering a simple four-step process to tackle those inner demons-addiction, people-pleasing, self-judgment, you name it-and transform them with self-compassion.
What I love about the sound of this one is how practical it seems. Gabby breaks down complex emotional patterns into steps that you can actually do while juggling the chaos of life. Imagine unlocking a calmer, more confident version of yourself without spending hours meditating in a dark room. Yes, please.
I’ve got high hopes for this-who doesn’t want to finally turn off the negative stories looping in their brain? If Gabby delivers what she’s promising, this might just be the ultimate guide to inner peace.
2. You Have The Magic by Haley Hoffman Smith
Predicted Rating: 4/5
Tropes/Subjects: Manifestation, Law of Attraction, Brain Rewiring
Release Date: May 6, 2025
If you’re anything like me, you’ve spent a fair amount of time daydreaming about manifesting your dream life while clutching a rose quartz in one hand and a cup of coffee in the other. Well, You Have The Magic promises to turn that woo-woo dream into a reality! Haley Hoffman Smith is here to show us that the magic we’ve been seeking is already inside of us. Not just in our crystals or vision boards-but in our own minds.
Haley combines neuroscience with a healthy dose of manifestation magic, using tools like the Subconscious Breakthrough Formula and EFT Tapping (basically tapping away your blocks like a magical wizard) to rewire those limiting beliefs. And the best part? It’s all about embracing your own inner power to create the life you truly want.
If this book works as promised, I’ll be summoning abundance and positivity with nothing but my own energy and a little sprinkle of manifestation magic. Law of Attraction- here I come!
4. Things No One Taught Us About Love by Vex King
Predicted Rating: 5/5
Tropes/Subjects: Self-love, healthy relationships, emotional healing
Release Date: April 25, 2024
Look, if you’re anything like me, love feels a bit like trying to follow a recipe for a cake you’ve never baked before. Sometimes it’s a total disaster, sometimes it’s perfect, but most of the time, you’re just winging it. Enter Vex King, who’s here to tell us all that love isn’t the fairy tale we’ve been led to believe. Spoiler alert: it’s not about “the one,” it’s about you and how you love yourself.
In Things No One Taught Us About Love, Vex sets out to fix all those myths we’ve been fed- about how love is something external that solves all our problems (errr, no thanks, that’s a lot of pressure to put on one person). This book is about reclaiming your own power and learning how to build strong, healthy relationships that are grounded in understanding and self-compassion.
So, if you’ve ever felt like you’re chasing after love in all the wrong places, or like your relationships keep crashing and burning, Vex’s got your back. I’m imagining this will be the perfect blend of insightful, practical, and deeply woo-woo, just how I like it. A bit of soul-searching, a bit of “how to set boundaries without feeling guilty,” and a whole lot of “here’s how to heal from the past so you can love better.”
Basically, if this book is even half as good as Good Vibes, Good Life, I’m going to be shouting about it from the rooftops. Ready for some real love lessons? I know I am!
5. Worthy by Jamie Kern Lima
Predicted Rating:4/5
Tackles: Overcoming self-doubt, resilience, personal growth
Release Date: February 23, 2024
Alright, here’s the thing: I believe –Worthy is going to be that book. You know, the one that promises to shake you out of your self-doubt coma and remind you that, yes, you are indeed worthy of everything you dream of, if you can stop second-guessing yourself long enough to believe it. Now, I’ll admit, I’ve never seen Jamie Kern Lima on a talk show or in a motivational video (yet!), but after reading about her journey from Denny’s waitress to billion-dollar mogul, I’m intrigued.
This book is all about getting rid of the rubbish stories we tell ourselves (like “I’m not good enough” or “Who am I to dream big?”). Jamie’s been there, done that, and now she’s handing us the blueprint to get unstuck. Expect some tough love, practical tools to build self-worth, and a healthy dose of “stop making excuses for why you can’t have it all.” It’s all about embracing who you truly are and breaking through those limiting beliefs we’ve been clinging to like an old cardigan.
If this book even half delivers on its promise, I’ll be walking around like I’ve just unlocked a secret level of life. You know, full of self-belief and ready to tackle whatever comes next, because, well, I’m worthy of it. Let’s do this!
6. Open When by Dr. Julie Smith
Predicted Rating: 5/5
Tropes/Subjects: Emotional resilience, mental health, practical advice
Release Date: 31st December 2024
Dr. Julie Smith has such a warm, no-nonsense approach to mental health, and I’ve got high hopes for this one. It’s designed like a book you can dip into when life throws you a curveball, so I’m predicting this will be one to keep handy on the bedside table.
I absolutely adored Why Has Nobody Told Me This Before? So much so that I passed my copy on as a gift to someone I felt needed it.
Julie writes so wonderfully, so incredibly authentically that you feel like you’re chatting with a lovely, patient friend who truly has your back. Here’s hoping for more of the same from this little number!
7. The Let Them Theory by Mel Robbins
Predicted Rating 5/5
Tropes/Subjects: Boundaries, personal power, letting go of control
Release Date: December 24, 2024
Well, if there’s one person who can slap some sense into us with just two words, it’s Mel Robbins. Let Them is all about not driving yourself up the wall trying to control people, situations, or whether that colleague from work likes you (spoiler: They really don’t, but who cares?). Instead, Mel wants us to take all that wasted energy and put it into ourselves-our happiness, our goals, our ridiculously brilliant potential.
If you’ve ever found yourself spiraling over someone’s opinion, fuming over why people can’t just act right, or bending over backward for people who wouldn’t so much as lean forward for you, then this book is basically your intervention. Mel’s style is straight-talking and no-nonsense, backed by research and real-life stories that’ll make you rethink all the energy you’ve been pouring into things you cannot change.
I’m expecting this one to be equal parts empowering and “oof, that hit close to home.” If it delivers, I’ll be scribbling LET THEM in capital letters on every Post-it note I own.
Cannot emphasise how much I NEED this book.
8. Choose Joy by Sophie Cliff
Predicted Rating: 4.5/5
Tropes/Subjects: Burnout recovery, prioritizing happiness, self-worth
Release Date: November 8, 2022
This book is basically a warm, encouraging pep talk from that one friend who always knows the right thing to say. (Not the one who suggests “just be positive” when you’re on the verge of throwing your laptop out the window, but the one who actually listens and helps you find real, actionable solutions.)
Sophie Cliff is all about joy, not in the forced, toxic positivity way, but in the “let’s actually figure out what makes you happy and do more of that” way. She blends positive psychology with practical steps to help us choose joy instead of just hoping it turns up one day like a lost Amazon package.
This one feels like a must-read for anyone burnt out, overwhelmed, or wondering why they spend so much time being busy but not happy. I’m expecting to underline a lot, probably nod furiously, and, if all goes well, actually start putting my happiness higher on the to-do list.
So, there you have it – my self-love reading essentials for taking care of my relationships, with myself and others. I’m hoping these books will be as good as they sound, but we’ll see! If you’ve read any of these or fancy joining me for a buddy read, let me know.
Here’s to a February filled with love, growth, and just the right amount of chocolate.
Much, much love to you,
Your Chaotic Bookworm
